“There is no one way to raise kids. Every kid is unique and each should be taught as such.”
There has been a controversy going around these days after the Wall Street Journal posted Amy Chua’s article on why Chinese Mothers are Superior (okay.. my title should be like this… but because she compared the Chinese parenting style to American parenting style, I am just doing a parody, okay? ). I don’t even want to give the link here… you may google the article up.
Anyways, I have been reading an uproar response from “American parents.” And no, this post is not all about why American mothers are inferior. This is just a satirity of the actual article. SEO, folks! SEO! LOL.
All these are happening when we are about to enroll my boy for his piano class and my girl for her drama and ballet classes. The irony of it. LOL. Can you imagine me almost stepping a step back just because of what I read? Ha-ha.
Anyways, my husband has been saying to that style of parenting – well sort of – here in Malaysia. There is so much competetion in school that all (read my lips – ALL) are expected (this is not an option already) to go for tuition classes just so they could catch up with whatever they study in school. I know that because my husband used to teach standard 1 (grade 1) pupil tuition classes before.
And so, the kids don’t have much time to play with their friends.
They go to school, come back, do homework, go for tuition classes. That’s on weekedays. On weekends, they go for the extra curricular classes like drama school, sports (name all you can, we have it) lessons, music lessons, dance lessons, etc.
At the end of the day, kids have no life.
And I am not raised with that style of parenting. I don’t have a career but a small-scale blogging business. I stay at home. But I feel very much a successful person. What is a definition of success anyway? It’s not in the financial status, not in the career area, not in geographical location… but for me, a success is in the contentment of the heart. (I may quote this for my fb status later -beware. LOL)
And where was I? Ohh… so before my boy started his primary school, I sat down with my husband and discussed with him openly my expectations:
- No pressure
- I want my boy to have time to play after he comes home from school
- Limit extra curricular classes
- Don’t forget he’s only in Standard 1
And I have to be firm with this. Otherwise, we would be raising kids that are deprived of childhood. As much as we can, we try to avoid joining the Frankensteins who are trying to make our children masters of the universe. Such children may split the atom, but they won’t be much fun to live with.
And I say: They may split the atom, but will never think to question what it will be used for, or even if it is a good idea to do at all.
Having said all these, the best style in parenting is when mothers keep on praying for their children, teaching them with rod and yet with love. Also as parents, our roles should include:
- Discovering the potential and talents of each kid and help them enhance it – if he doesn’t like to play piano, maybe he likes to go swimming instead.
- Take time to listen to them
- Have a regular family outing
- Have a regular family devotions
- Pray
- Pray some more
- Keep on praying
- Pray again
- Pray without ceasing
- And the best of all. Pray.